Paris Hilton Must Die

I won't bore you with the extra-long list of this twat's transgressions against polite society, but THIS IT IT. I CANNOT TAKE ANYMORE.

She has a DUI. She has a suspended license. She owns a number of incredible cars, including a Bentley Continental GT convertible that apparently lacks a visible gas cap — she drove it empty until it stopped and then wondered why her new car was broken. A good Samaritan (who rightly should have appropriated the keys and vehicle) helped her get back on the road.

Honestly, everyone knows you are borderline retarded, Paris, why not let someone responsible drive for you? Then you can get bombed all you like, and flash your cootch to the paparazzi all you want, without endangering other people or abusing innocent cars.

Now Jalopnik reports that the clearly-deranged minds at Bullrun asked Miss Herpes &mdash er, I mean Hilton, to drive a brand-new Spyker supercar for their program.

Come on, stupids, this is like asking Britney Spears to to head up a "MoPS" group.

I'm not normally a homicidal person, I promise, but I can't help hoping for fiery burnout. A better end for the non-talented slut-ebrity I cannot imagine.