America's Oldest and the World's Greatest Beer

I won't tell you where I got it, since Yuengling Lager is impossible to purchase anywhere west of the Mississippi and it is essential I keep the supply chain open.

Anyway. You there on the East Coast can enjoy it wherever and whenever you want to, so what are you waiting for? Don't like beer? Trust me: you will like this one.

Plus, it's been a family-run business since its inception in 1829 and their products have always maintained the highest standards in quality (even when they were producers of ice cream during Prohibition). In contrast, the Coors family are a bunch of double-dealing Nazi sympathizers who hide shoddy product and bad politics under wholesome advertising promises. Bah!

Not to mention that Coors brewing has never produced a worthwhile beer.

Enough ranting! I have Lager to imbibe. Suckers!