Almost Finished With Tedious Postings

I want a bike. I haven't owned a bike for a mighty long time, say, the late '80s. It was a Nishiki city bike and I absolutely loved it. They don't make them no more, so I'm looking at these fabulous beach cruisers all the cool kids have.

Doubt it will surprise you to learn I'm not exactly the off-roading type. Not outdoorsy, no, not at all. Weather and insects are what keeps me mostly indoors. But Superfly adores biking and--under the right circumstances--I do, too. Shared activities make for goo fun in relationships, we can all agreee. Why, in the interest of sharing I even went camping for the first time last summer! Granted, it was on a beach and we had an air mattress and nearby shower, but I slept outside, people!

So, anyway, no "mountain" bikes for this filly. I even found a beach cruiser that's black and pink with a darling little skull on the seat! Besides, these fancy-geared bikes all cost wa-a-a-ay too much for an occasional activity. If--heaven forbid--I have to go up a steep hill or something, I'll just manage it the old-fashioned way: stand up on the pedals and heave myself up the damn hill. Gears, shmears.

And when someone steals my cool beach cruiser, I'll be out less than $100, as opposed to more than $500. Of course, they won't enjoy their theivery for long, as I'll find them, beat them senseless, and take their wallet.

Anyone have experience with beach cruisers or buying a bike they'd like to share?